humor

What’s in a Name? Finding a constellation of Orions … and the truth

I have a weird name. It was weird by the standards of Sonoma County, where I grew up, and it’s weird by the considerably less conservative standards of Berkeley, where I live now. My name doesn’t match the assumptions people make about me based on my appearance, and nearly every time I need to tell someone my name, some version of this little skit plays out: Them: “What’s your  name?” Me: “Orion.” Them: “Are you Irish?” Me: “No. It’s a Greek name.” Them: “You’re Greek?” Me: “No, I’m Italian. And Swedish.” Them (confused): “Uh, OK … what’s your first name?” Me: “That is my first  name.” Them (getting visibly annoyed): “Uh … how do you spell it?” Me: “O-r-i-” Them (even more annoyed): “Wait, what?! ‘O-r-y’?” (this goes on for a bit…) Them (exasperated): “OK, what’s your last ...